禁漫天堂

What do you mean by "one day dramas"? How young? Whats the age gap? How is your Spanish? How much time have you really spent with her and her family/friends in her culture/environment? Where and when/how did you meet?

Simply put long distance relationships do not work, not anywhere anymore in this generation, it is done and gone with and this is especially so here in Colombia.

Don't be fooled by all the bull sh*t that you see and hear on Youtube, Facebook and social media.

Speaking from my own experience, this being traveling throughout Colombia since November 1990 (35 YEARS!), now having lived in/outside Medellin for almost 15 years, constant travel/road trips to every city, island, region, municipality, pueblo and attraction in Colombia, having had gf's in Cali/Medellin/Bogota/Quibdo/, was married 5 years to a Paisa which ended in 2017, have seen the "good, the bad and the ugly" not only my own experience but friends too..............have come to really understand the culture (large part because of my improved Spanish over the decades) in some ways that rival local Colombians themselves.

Only you can answer your question honestly and confidently. Trust your instincts/what you are feeling.

I could write a book of what I have experienced, seen play out and continue to see almost daily. Some insight that I would give will make most men shutter in fear, it's raw and real.

In summary "you don't know what you don't know", there is a good reason why I am single and will remain such for many reasons.

I am sure others will opine their experiences so for the moment I stand down.

Godspeed!

How young?聽 How big is the age difference? As a general rule the larger the age difference, the more probable it is that you will both have problems.聽 Not always, but...

One thing to keep in mind - for most Colombians, when you marry the woman, you are also marrying the family.聽 Not always, but often the family will take precedence or an equal position as has the husband.

If you want to get along with the wife you will also have to get along with the family.

Are you going to live with her in Colombia, or will she emigrate to your home country?聽 You both should have a plan in either case, of getting citizenship, of vacations, how to share life back and forth between two countries and each others' families.

There are no hard and fast rules but if your level of Spanish or her level of English (or whatever your native language is) is fairly good, you will have a better chance of making it work and understanding a new culture and new and different viewpoints.

You must both enter into the relationship with both eyes open, using your minds at least as much as following your hearts or whatever other body parts may be involved...

If you're asking on an internet forum, then you probably shouldn't get married.

If you're asking on an internet forum, then you probably shouldn't get married. - @mtbe

lol...

I gotta 100% echo what @South American Voyager said... and I've only been here less than 3 years! I've never been married to a Colombiana, but if I ever get married again, it likely will NOT be to a Colombiana. Not unless the circumstances were EXTREMELY secure and safe for me. my peace, and livelihood.

3 years is enough to see what I need to know. I am SO glad I didn't marry anyone, nor pull the trigger on buying a $52K property here in Barranquilla. I'd hate to be committed/tied to this country in that way. Not after learning everything I have learned about it by living here.

Anyway... yeah, forget about long-distance relationships ANYWHERE on Earth, they just don't work. Especially not in Colombia... you could literally be living in the same city/town as your "novia", and she'll STILL be cheating on you with her "barrio boyfriend" (or any number of other foreigners). Colombian culture does NOT support honesty, loyalty, or genuine kindness AT ALL. In fact, it actively PUNISHES these qualities/behaviors!

And it goes without saying (I hope!) - Do NOT send money to any "chica" overseas, that's just flushing money away (unless that's your intent, in which case, knock yourself out).

However... DO enjoy the "fun times" with whatever chica you find, with zero expectations of anything lasting beyond that day/night or - best case scenario - that week. This is the culture, it is what it is 馃し馃従鈥嶁檪锔� Welcome to Colombia!

If you're asking on an internet forum, then you probably shouldn't get married. - @mtbe

hahahah!聽 C'mon, man... be nice 馃槄 At least offer some nugget of wisdom to the guy... "Be a bro and SAVE a bro".

If you're asking on an internet forum, then you probably shouldn't get married. - @mtbehahahah! C'mon, man... be nice 馃槄 At least offer some nugget of wisdom to the guy... "Be a bro and SAVE a bro". - @ChineduOpara

That is about as good a piece of advice as could be offered to someone asking this question!

Okay....I'll be a bit more detailed.聽 It's always an ego boost when a pretty young thing pays interest to you, when those of the same age in your country won't give you a second look.

1)聽 If you are worried or concerned now about her family, then trust your gut.聽 Her family will always come first.

2)聽 You will look like a piggy bank to your new family.聽 They will ask for 'loans' of small amounts that will never get paid back.聽 There will always be some reason why they can't pay you back.聽 Or, they will want you to 'invest' in an opportunity for one of them to open a business or send them to school to learn something.聽 Those might actually be a good thing...you have to decide.聽 Early on in my relationship, I put my foot down.聽 Now, one of her brothers won't talk to us.聽 I'm fine with that.聽 She frets over it.

3)聽 If you are not familiar with Colombian culture, family comes first.聽 Lies come second.聽 They may be little white lies (Oh...I'm driving in the center, will be right there...when if fact, they haven't even left the driveway yet), to "my laptop broke and I need a new one", or my brother is in trouble with the mafia cause he took a loan and they are threatening my mother (which could be true, but still...)

4)聽 families are loud when they get together.聽 When my extended family get together, I usually stick around for 30 minutes, then have to leave...it's just too loud for me...too much commotion.

5) age difference is not a huge deal in Colombia.聽 Many young women grew up without fathers, so look for that father figure in their life.聽 It's not uncommon.聽 Just make sure you have something in common with the woman other than a bank account.

Been married over 20 years with my Colombiana, so it can work.聽 She's older than me...and ugly.聽

@mtbe

That final line you wrote supports every Male Foreigner + Colombiana married couple I have ever seen in Colombia in my 3 years living here. The woman is always obese, too skinny, or basically unattractive in some way (at least when we're talking about "conventionally attractive"). The Colombianas who have even an ATOM of conventional attractiveness, are toxic (mental illness, unresolved trauma, chronic dishonesty for no damn reason, etc), are doing sex work in some way shape or form, and are basically deathly allergic to commitment of any sort.

That being said, looks are only 1 aspect of a committed relationship, and it sounds to me like you DID find love. Congrats, and may the universe continue to bless you and your family.

Everything else you listed is 100% facts as well. It's like you read my friggin' mind...