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My year in Brazil: the good, the bad and the ugly (and why I can鈥檛 wait to go back!)

I鈥檝e been meaning to do this for a while. Thing is, every time I decided to put pen to paper it never felt like the right time. It鈥檚 as if 8,5 months on I was still digesting what has turned out to be my life鈥檚 true formative period. This is a year in Brazil, not a year in Provence and while I won鈥檛 end up getting my 鈥榤emoir鈥� published 脿 la Peter May, if it helps even just one person in the slightest, that鈥檇 be great 馃槉

My background before going to Brazil

In August 2017 I was working in finance in Dublin, Ireland when I met the love of my life, a Manauara named Glenda. It鈥檚 hard not to get swept off your feet by a Brazuca but this one was genuine! Fast forward a year and a half and we decided to get married, have a child (who鈥檚 now a beautiful bouncy boy of 16 months) and move to Manaus to try life there for a year before returning to Ireland. In the meantime, I learned and spoke hundreds of hours of Portuguese, my Portuguese was borderline B2 level and I was feeling very confident about using it in Brazil.

Why we chose Manaus

I鈥檒l be honest, I鈥檝e never spent as much time in my life standing in front of a map saying 鈥淣o, Rio鈥檚 down here, Manaus is all the way up here鈥� and 鈥淣o, you can鈥檛 commute to S茫o Paulo for work in your car鈥�. Understandably, Copacabana and the statue of Christ the Redeemer are what stick in many people鈥檚 minds when it comes to Brazil. Manaus is the home city of my wife. She was the only Manauara we both knew of in Dublin, and there are 10,000+ Brazilians there, I certainly got something different! Most people looking to set up in Brazil probably won鈥檛 give Manaus too much consideration: hot even by Brazilian standards and exacerbated by the humidity, no natural beaches, isolated 鈥� there are no roads to other parts of Brazil. Well, there is the BR-319 which puts the cosmopolitan hotspot of Porto Velho within reach, 800km later. But 鈥� yeah鈥� you get what I mean. If you鈥檙e coming from Europe through S茫o Paulo it adds an extra 5-6 hours onto your flight time. However, if you鈥檙e of the more resilient type you鈥檒l be richly rewarded by this amazing city in a unique setting! 馃槉 Manaus won鈥檛 win any prizes on paper but it has completely won over my heart!

How it went

Brazil is higher risk, higher reward. I had the most amazing experiences there but almost lost my shirt on numerous occasions too! For the first two weeks I stayed there with my wife and kids we used an Airbnb apartment in downtown Manaus as a base for looking at apartments to rent and getting to know the city. The apartment was on the 17th floor and we had great views of the Rio Negro.
After we found our apartment for the next year, we started the process of getting married. We started the process around November 18th 2018 and finished on March 22nd the next year. No Vegas style weddings here! However, the most arduous process was yet to come, yet one that should have been a lot more enjoyable: the birth of our son, baby Noah.

If I had known I wouldn鈥檛 have listened for a second, but that鈥檚 why first-hand knowledge of anything in Brazil is so valuable! My wife suggested that Noah could be delivered in a public maternidade. It鈥檇 save having to fork out R$14,500 in a private one and she had already given birth twice using the public system. It鈥檇 be okay, I was told. Yikes. The total lack of being looked after during the pregnancy should have been a big red flag. My mother, a nurse, sounded bemused beyond belief every time she called, asking what date we had been given for the c-section to take place and I鈥檇 reply 鈥淕lenda told me that you just come there on the night when you start getting contractions鈥�. Still, Glenda, my wife, was happy with the situation so I trusted her.

Fast forward to April 2nd 2019 and it鈥檚 time to go to the maternidade. We arrive at our local unit. 鈥淯m yeah uhh you鈥檙e not having contractions鈥� the nurse said sheepishly. Basically Brazilian code speak for 鈥淲e don鈥檛 have enough midwifes or equipment available鈥� or 鈥淵eah, I鈥檓 not feeling up to delivering another one鈥� We decided immediately to go to the main maternity hospital in Manaus. My wife was put sitting on a hard plastic chair, surrounded by other women who couldn鈥檛 wait. Some were doubled over with the pain, some first time mothers were sobbing into their mother鈥檚 dresses, others just sat there while their mother or father demanded an ambulance so they could take their daughter to the nearest private hospital. It was complete and utter chaos, fully reminiscent of scenes charities use in their commercials. My wife was finally admitted, 16 hours after she arrived at the maternidade. Her C-section was performed beside another woman in a theatre only meant for one operation at a time.
Baby Noah was born just in the nick of time, he had to be resuscitated but it could have been a lot worse had my mother-in-law not hounded the doctor on duty to 鈥榙o it now鈥�. Maybe they don鈥檛 deserve to be the butt of so many jokes!

Before this day, we were considering returning to Ireland. Now, it was our duty to do so. It was too much to even imagine this could happen to our kids and their future partners if we stayed in Brazil.
The next 8 months, well, babies make things go fast. We made better friends, not many, most people still wanted to collect their gringo tax. I gained permanent residency. We go out more. I made it my mission to try all the foods only found in the Amazon. I started going a lot more to the Mercado Adolpho Lisboa. We stopped watching the endlessly bleak stream of murders and corruption that made up the news on Globo. We stopped watching Al么 Amazonas. We went out more to restaurants and indulged my love for the historic center and its authentic charms. My parents visited in June and we saw Manaus like we never did before. I got to know the best of Manaus and began to fully embrace it for what it was, warts and all.

A huge thanks to abthree, Emerson, Cecilia and Marcelo. Without you, I wouldn鈥檛 have held on, let alone thrived. Your advice, friendship and evenings out refocused my mind and made my last 8 months a lot better than my first 5!

What I learned

These are what stood out for me the most. Things that, had I known in advance, would have made the year in Brazil significantly less stressful. There are hundreds of other tips, tricks and pieces of advice all around the forum and I won鈥檛 cover those ones.

鈥⒙� 聽 Don鈥檛 compare your country to Brazil

Just don鈥檛. You鈥檒l spare yourself endless hours of misery and arguments with your other half, in-laws and friends. Like many inexperienced expats who鈥檝e posted on the site, I was like this too. For months. I complained about Brazilians not having a culture of doing the right thing, about not giving a crap about the customer, about not having a culture of success, about being gossiping layabouts, about how it doesn鈥檛 even occur to people that the way they see the world is completely messed up.
Now, there is some truth in that, but the population are acutely aware of its limitations. They鈥檙e also aware of their homicide rate and general levels of corruption. They don鈥檛 need to be reminded. So 鈥榓me-o ou deixe-o鈥�. Yes, Brazil might be a heap of crap on paper compared to wherever you鈥檙e from in Europe or the States with your sky high HDI ratings, but life isn鈥檛 lived on paper.

Instead, look at the country as a whole. Look at all the things you could never see, experience or taste in your homeland. Brazil is higher-risk, higher-reward. If you can learn from your 鈥榥egative鈥� experiences and disappointments then you will have an incredibly rich and rewarding experience, becoming a far more resilient, resourceful and wise person in the process.

鈥⒙� 聽 ALWAYS get a second opinion and probably a third one too

When you arrive in Brazil, you鈥檒l probably need to enter into a fair few administrative processes: getting a CPF, extending your 90 day visa, permanent residency, visiting a cart贸rio to notarize some documents or to get married. As you can imagine, Brazilian administrative processes are tailored to Brazilian citizens. Birth certificate, RG, CPF and pronto. When you come along with your foreign passport, criminal record (hopefully blank) and other foreign documents (all translated locally and apostilled) there鈥檚 inevitably going to be a moment of confusion.
The first group of employees will tell you 鈥淯hhh I鈥檓 not sure we can do that here鈥�, the others will tell you 鈥淵ou鈥檙e going to need more documents鈥�, the odd one or will say 鈥淵eah, that looks about right鈥�. So, why get a second opinion. From experience this is how it鈥檒l go: first group鈥檚 advice turns out to be wrong, the process is open to foreigners, it鈥檚 just that they haven鈥檛 a clue and they can鈥檛 be bothered to find out.
The others waste 6-7 weeks of your time getting documents issued and apostilled in your home country only for another employee to inform you that the extra documents aren鈥檛 needed when you finally gather them all together to be handed in.
The odd one or two employees either know the process 100% or not at all. It鈥檚 usually feast or famine with them. You鈥檙e spared all the hassle above or you arrive on the day, after waiting all that time, and are told 鈥淣茫o deu certo鈥�

PLEASE also shop around if you are advised by the cart贸rio to use another professional to assist in your process. As part of my marriage process I had to get various documents translated. They advised me to visit a certain translator that many hapless Manaus expats have fallen victim to, a certain Minerva. R$600 to translate a US birth certificate and an extra R$300 if I wanted 鈥榚xpress鈥� service i.e. within 2 weeks ! She justified her fees by claiming 鈥淭here鈥檚 lots of little boxes with funny words鈥�. Yeah, I鈥檝e always wondered how to translate 鈥榟ospital鈥� into Portuguese !

I left without saying a thing. This wasn鈥檛 just paying gringo tax, it was paying deferred tax for all the years I hadn鈥檛 lived in Brazil ! A quick google search later told me that there was another translator, Paulo Renan Gomes da Silva, in the city centre. R$170 for the same document and he did it in 2 days. Paulo is another one of those people that helped me stay sane. A true gentleman, he did his work quickly and professionally and was always willing to do my translation within the same day if it was really urgent. He always stayed for 15-20 minutes to chat with us when I came to pick up any translations, Paulo we can鈥檛 wait to meet you again when we return to Manaus next year!

鈥⒙� 聽 Where there鈥檚 a will, there鈥檚 a way 鈥� always

Brazil is a nation of certified Grade A ball-breakers when it comes to arbitrary and completely illogical requirements for the most simple of processes. Want to buy a soap holder and a whisk at a small store that might well have closed down in the next 5 minutes if you hadn鈥檛 bought them ? Yeah, we鈥檒l need to send you to three different counters to scan the same items and then we鈥檒l need to know both your parents names. Don鈥檛 ask why, they don鈥檛 know either.
There are more serious situations however. Say you don鈥檛 have that document. Say the deadline was yesterday. Say you were given a 10:15 timeslot and its now 10:35. Enter the magic words: 鈥楾em outro jeito 鈥� ?鈥�

Imagine a poor government employee working since 7 a.m. after a 1h bus ride. Complaints after complaints about the service, about why they should work faster, about why the person in question should have got a favourable decision and that it鈥檚 the employee鈥檚 fault. I鈥檝e seen it so many times. These people get the rule book thrown at them. The employee isn鈥檛 paid enough to care and certain not enough for this.

When the magic words 鈥楾em outro jeito 鈥� ?鈥� come out of your mouth, you鈥檙e effectively saying 鈥淟et鈥檚 try and work on this together, I鈥檓 on your side鈥� On numerous occasions this has saved me. I thought I had messed up on my marriage process when it wasn鈥檛 possible for me to get my passport to New York to have it apostilled. They said the whole process wouldn鈥檛 be completed until I could do so. How was I going to be able to do that. I shook my head and with a scowling 鈥淥brigado鈥�, left. After 5 minutes of fuming outside and a 鈥榞etting it off my chest鈥� phone call, I was prompted by my future wife to use the magic words. When I sat in front of another employee, explained my situation and used these words they said. 鈥淗mmm 鈥� maybe you can have the passport copied and certified as an authentic copy with the seal of the US consulate here in Manaus鈥� Bingo! It worked !

Conclusion

So there you have it, the incoherent ramblings of a wet behind the ears expat in Brazil. It was an adventure. It did change me as a person. Significantly. It taught me how to be more patient but at the same time, how to assert myself in order to move things on. It taught me how to tolerate people who are more close-minded and ignorant, how to coax and cajole them towards the path of knowledge but also when to draw the line and stand up for what鈥檚 right. Brazil will teach you about people, about the importance of true relationships, about how to judge a person鈥檚 true intentions.

8 months ago, I swore I鈥檇 never return to Brazil. That I鈥檇 never forgive it for anything that had happened there. Now, not only have I made peace with Brazil but I can鈥檛 wait to go back there again. I miss the sun. I miss the food, I miss the 鈥榓nything goes鈥� vibe of Manaus, the unique traits brought on by its remoteness. I miss visiting my off-the-grid relatives and eating their tambaqui and matrinx茫. I miss the honly-tonk centro and its views of the beautiful Rio Negro.

Guys, I鈥檇 highly recommend everyone to try Brazil. It will change you significantly and for the better. Stay smart, stay safe and stay open-minded.

Thanks for reading.

Brian